Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
