yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
