once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Randomize
