He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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