Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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