I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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