she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize