I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
