We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
