just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
