first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
