I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
