I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
