Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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