Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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