marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
