its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
