I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize