We're like a lot better than the average bears
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
