She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
