i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
