The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
