i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I have fence marks all over my body
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
