i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
