Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
it glows. i had to have it.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Randomize
