As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
