i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
4 words: hood of his car
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Randomize
