What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
