Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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