I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
