i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
