i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
