I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
