I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
