Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
