...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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