I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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