Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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