im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Your penis caused this!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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