i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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