What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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