Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
