You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
why didn't you poke me back
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
