she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
