Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
