Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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