My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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