Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
