i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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