I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
